Thursday 08/15/96 How to refuse, without hurting the other person: Me: Would you like to test ride my bike? Other: Sure, you bet! Not today, but certainly! Friday 08/16/96 From a customer support site: "We feel badly about the problems customers have experienced downloading Microsoft IE". This seems to confirm my theory: "We believe tnat we do somebody a favor by feeling bad". Monday 08/19/96 Conflict in goal setting: If I set the goal as 'find something', I'll fail if I don't. If I say 'look for something', I might stop too early. * Observing my feelings without saying "you shouldn't feel that way" is like listening to a friend without judging. * It makes sense to tell the truth when I mess up - the punishment cannot be as bad as the guilt. At any rate, if guils is intensifying, it could be the signal that time is coming to confess. * Conflict - taking the blame, as Carnegie recommends vs not allowing other people to drain my energy. * Observing my feelings during the argument. One side of me is ready for battle, to provde that I am right. Other side doesn't give a damn, it just wants to leave and go surf the Web. * I feel that, the more I fight, the more significance I give to the subject of argument - the worse I feel. Wednesday 08/21/96 More confirmations that I create reality: 1) Fall of client-server in favor of Intranet. 2) Demise of online services with the rise of Internet. 3) Stumbling of commercial software, as shareware takes over - practically every vendor offers free trials. 4) Creation of streaming audio (long ago, I had an idea of playing MOD music file by processing as it downloads). * 'On hold' messages, like "your call is important to us" - they reduce anxiety of those who are calling. * Synergy - state of harmony, without conflicts, with improved creativity. * "Guilt is something I rarely have the pleasure to experience. Either I do not worry about what I do, or I do not do what results in worry." Monday 08/26/96 Observation of how procrastination may begin - I want to ask someone for advice, but tell myself that I handle the problem myself. However, I don't have the desire to do it myself. Deadlock. * Perso who keeps insisting on how sorry he is, beging to get annoying, since I have to constantly convince him that he's not at fault. * Sometimes Personal Enhropy works its way into jokes. When it happens, my intent is muddled and other person may feel hurt. Tuesday 08/27/96 Talking to Lois (author Closet Rebel's Guide to Personal Freedom) > Who are these people who do call themselves > Masters ? Are they frauds ? > Or is it possible to reach spriritual peak and totally > forget what was the reason for climbing ? Hey, you're good. i heard there is an astral layer where people can do parlour tricks and pull in a lot of power to use, without heart... * Situation: "Co-worker calls me in panic, asks for help. In the middle of the call says he needs to do something else and leaves". I feel stressed, since it looks like I should be doing something, but I don't have enough information. My friend Yuri says: "I look at such situations calmly. When it happens to me, I realize that co-worker has more important things to do, and so do I". Me: "So, just forget it till they call again?" Yuri: "You got it". Friday 08/30/96 Conflict - hasty solution to relieve pressure of indecision VS put away and never get back to it. Thursday 09/05/96 Best way to listen when somebody interrupts me: stop talking and look interested. My boss does this and it feels very flattering. * From a song "One day I shall be released by my Creator". Assuming that we can't find freedom ourselves, until we are given permission from above. And there is plenty of evidence that we can't. And some examples that we can. * "You use the word, "we," a lot. I've got news for you. We are going to do nothing. You're going to do your thing, and I'm gonna do mine." Tuesday 09/10/96 Two only feelings - Love and Fear. These are light and dark sides. Wednesday 09/11/96 Business scenario - observing the flow of feelings. I have a motorized bicycle called Bike Machine. A firm that sells similar motors told me that they will give me percentage if I refer buyers. First reaction - cool, I don't have to do anything, and the money will flow! Next, energy boost - let's make a little handout I can give to people who are interested. Then doubt - what if I lose the pleasure of riding? What if I'll only ride in the places where I can see maximum potential customers? What if I lose my friendly attitude toward people who ask me questions about my bike? After all, their interest determines whether I will get my referral fee. Is the money worth the worry? Let's look at it this way. The product is excellent, as far as I know, so I can remain honest. Buyer doesn't care what happens to his money after he's made the purchase. The company benefits, since they get more customers. Frankly, everybody wins, so it looks like something that Anthony Robbins called "creating value". So, what's the catch? Possibly, in my goals. Let's get clear on the goals then. The goal is the same as before, to keep riding and get enjoyment from my magnificient Bike Machine. Is somebody is seriously interested, tell them where they can buy such a motor. But be honest - since I know that there is another alternative that costs less and yet another that has more bells and whistles. Thursday 09/12/96 I feel that, when talking about common human problems, speaking in the first person is the right approach. it feels right and when I talk about self, I can actually change something rather than just whining about how bad the world is. Tuesday 09/17/96 Yuri came up with an idea: "Compose stories while in a lucid dream". This could be promising - the imagination in lucid dream is expanded and there are more chances to remember what I composed, than in a regular dream. * "He who asks a question may be a fool for five minutes, but he who never asks a question remains a fool forever." "A journey of a thousand miles begin with a single step." "The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious. It is the source of all true art and all science. He to whom this emotion is a stranger, who can no longer pause to wonder and stand rapt in awe, is as good as dead: his eyes are closed." "There are no guarantees. From the viewpoint of fear, none are strong enough. From the viewpoint of love, none are necessary." "Vision without action is a daydream. Action without vision is a nightmare." "We more frequently fail to face the right problem than fail to solve the problem we face." "When one door closes, another opens.But we often look so regretfully upon the closed door that we don't see the one that has opened for us. " "Your current safe boundries were once unknown frontiers." "The best way to predict your future is to create it!" "And in the end it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years." "You must be the change you wish to see in the world." "One machine can do the work of fifty ordinary men. No machine can do the work of one extraordinary man." |